Editor’s Note: Be sure to read Part I through V of this series from Iuka native Carlynn Rainey-Crawford in previous issues. Available online at www.tishco.news.
Back in 2006, I had no idea of what life had in store for me. To be honest, I’m glad I didn’t have a crystal ball to predict what would happen. It would have scared the heck out of me and I’m sure I would have run away to hide, at least for a while.
The older we become, the more perspective we have, but we still don’t know what the future holds. Only God holds the whole picture. If He revealed the whole picture of our lives all at once, I’m pretty sure we would all run and hide. In His wisdom, He gives us one day and one moment at a time. My career has had many challenges AND there have been many successes. It’s easy to focus on the negative unless you remember there are peaks AND valleys along the way. It’s easy to forget how far you’ve come unless you look back to where you started. Hence a theme throughout this series has been context is everything and hindsight too.
One could assume that I moved away to the big city and I’m living the high life. It’s easy to make assumptions about what someone’s life might be like. We live in a world where we have filters for the pictures we take and we post about the best parts of our lives. What if we pulled back the curtain to look at the parts that aren’t quite so polished? What about the not-so-neat and tidy parts? Life is rarely wrapped up in a neat little bow. To be honest, I am a little freaked that I’ve pulled back the curtain to write about the not-so-polished, neat, and tidy parts of my life. Regardless, I think it’s more important to share so others might not feel alone or feel as though they have fallen short. Don’t be ashamed of the struggles because they lend themselves to building character. And my oh my what character I have built!
The last question I asked the students at TCHS is, “How do you define success?”
What does success mean to you? The shortest path between two points is a straight line. Start and finish. Success is rarely completed with a straight line. It’s much like a map with construction, and detours, and can take much longer than anticipated. All those twists and turns and sometimes falling off the path completely means learning and gaining wisdom (aka context and hindsight). Don’t let the world tell you what success should be. You decide and pursue it. Success doesn’t have to mean lots of money or fame. It could be getting married and having a family or paying off debt or buying a house or spending more time with friends and family. Success is measured by how you are fulfilled and progress, not perfection.
My definition of success is to keep going, to learn from my mistakes, and do better. I want to continuously be a better daughter, wife, sister, friend, Christian, stepmom, and employee.
Every one of the “if I could go back and tell my younger self” bits of advice included in this series…well those aren’t just for my younger self, it’s for me right now today too.
Writing this series has been humbling. A few tears were shed, too. Sometimes writing it down causes you to think about it more thoroughly and thoughtfully. I didn’t get this far by myself. There have been people woven into this journey that have encouraged, reflected, come alongside me, cared and loved me through it. I would be completely remiss if I didn’t recognize God’s hand in all of it too. He has walked with me and guided me. Knowing that I am a shy, introverted girl, and yet I have a spirit of boldness that could only be explained as a gift from God. So, I am going to keep going and I’m taking all the context, hindsight, and life tidbits with me that I’ve learned along the way. My prayer is that you keep going too otherwise we may never get to our destination called success.